Kicked out from home. Life of a Model?

"I ponder if I should treat this
as good thing,
or a bad thing?"

Dear Diary.. Monday the 1st of February 2010, it's 10am in the morning.


This could be one of my most important diary entries I have ever written in my life.

If you'd like to know about the fucked up news, you could just skip 'Photoshoot as at 31.01.2010' and go halfway down to read 'The Challenge'.

Photoshoot as at 31.01.2010

So it began yesterday when I woke up at 6.30 pm in the afternoon, plenty of sleep, and Baby texted me a message asking if I wanted to do a photoshoot.

I was about to flat-out say No,

• it's too late in the evening,
• the shoot is too far in another state (freaking KL to Damansara),
• and I'd rather go back to sleep.

About a thousand more points I could come up with, but instead
I was abit curious, I asked who was shooting us.

A message came back that said 'professional photographer, MORISTEE studio.'
I spent a good 5 minutes looking it up on the net and I checked out their line of work.

I jumped at it as soon as I saw it. Packed my luggage with clothes and accesories within seconds and rushed out to my car at 7.10pm.

Then he had to be there.

He was outside having an evening jog. So I just mentioned 'I'm heading out for a photoshoot, I'll be back around 11pm'. Then he starts complaining about me getting nothing from this, wasting our family's money for petrol, blahblahblah. Fucking contradictor, just gave me and my bros $300 for shopping on my small bro's birthday.

I turned a deaf ear on him and left. I didn't need to hear this shit, my life had been in the fucking sewers for 3 long years serving under him, depression, daily degradation of self-worth, killing self-pride, emotional stress and misery, and things recently are just getting good and really interesting.

Took me some time, but I reached Damansara Perdana at around 8pm and had a look at Baby's photoshoot images, they were very nice, high-end fashion.

And then.. 'You, Strip'. And I got topless with pants still on (I know whats on your mind you dirty bastards ;] ) , photoshoot-photoshoot-photoshoot.

The result of one of our shoots:

"Confirmed, I have a big ass.
(Even bigger than baby's! )"

Desaintlights, Baby and I were all laughing so so hard because we put up that photo on Facebook.

Within 2 minutes, we had 12 'Likes' and 13 comments. The next 3 minutes, her notifications jumped to 50. After 10min we had bloody well over 100 comments and Likes added together.

That's just ONE of photos though, I took the Sam Fu theme, Army theme, Korean & Japanese-popstar theme. In 2 weeks time maybe 20 more photos will come from Desaintlights. Thank you Lee [:

Remember, You've seen just one.

Anyway, we went to have dinner and went back home at 1am in the morning.

_________________________________________________________________

The Challenge

The very next fucking morning... Dad sent the maid to get me to come down downstairs, and it was lecture allll the way for an hour's straight. So fucking what I came back at 1am instead of 11pm? EVERYONE does that, you think I'm a robot or something? I'm a human you fucking shithead.

I RESPECT my dad, I don't love him, much. But I respect him nevertheless.

He starts talking about those dumbasses Martin, KK and Jason, he's right about one thing that they're all idiots who can't make appointments and are only good at lying,

but he's classifying me in the same category? JUST BECAUSE I CAME BACK AT 1am INSTEAD OF 11pm, HOW FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD CAN YOU GET?

Whatever, he just issued me a challenge.

He has a problem not with my life, but how I handle things in life.

There's this shitty accounts on our property's rental I have yet to complete from the whole of December 2008 to the current month of January 2010 while working under his company, it's much more complicated than your average + and - , and I've been fucking busy handling other shits, plus the fact I hate doing our property rental accounts the most.

In 15 Days (deadline on the 15th of February 2010), if I can't complete that account, he is going to boot me out of the house, severe family ties with me and treat me as a dead son, and I'll look for a place of my own. Doesn't sound too bad actually, either way it's a win-win situation the way I look at it.

Complete the accounts and I still get to stay at home and show him that I'm not all-talk and that I've secured some very strong connections and potential clients to aid me in future. Proving him WRONG, further going on my own road to build a career after resigning from his company.

Or, I could severe family ties with my dad and finally gain independence, go wherever I want, do whatever I want, concentrate more on my shit and not give a damn about his shit. No more needing to hear him bitch around, or ask permission to do this and that. Sure it'll be a bitch to take care of myself, but I can get on with my own shit and finally live a real life. WONDERFUL!

The 15th of February 2010 is my deadline, aint gonna be much, but it's against my morals, my principles, my virtues, to finish things halfway.

I am going to finish it, in truth I don't need 15 days, probably just 5 days to get it done if I don't get interrupted by Ms. Tan with other works ofcourse, which has interrupted the completion of my accounts for the past 2 years.

Besides, I'd like to try just one more time to prove him wrong, and despite his consistently annoying old-fashioned stressful, manipulative, egoistical, no-nonsense ways and bitchy attitude, I would still like

to call someone my Father.

~Sam Insanity Sunshine.