I'm suffering.

Dear Diary,
Monday, 12th of January 2008, 1pm-ish

My depression has gotten worse, I want to be my positive self again but life keeps walking over my head, I need my friends at this time, but they have their own lives to live, noone can pull me out of this darkness, I'm on my knees, but I have to stand up myself again, just like that time when she died...

I'm down with a fever, but I'm fighting it continuing to pursue my gym schedule, I'm not letting anyone in my family know.

My heart hurts because there's a girl I like who's been swept away by another dude and she doesn't want me no more, guess she think she's got somebody better, sexier, whatever, but it's not like I can't live without her right? There's a part of me that wishes that I couldn't.

I've lost my confidence and determination, why? Because of my direction in life, I'm thinking of being a DJ.
I wanted to be an entertainer, but if I think logically, there's a big chance of Fail in the long-run, no income to support my parents, my own family, or even myself. My motivation for my classes almost went nil, there's something up with me

I have to stand up again, be unique again, be once again, different.
The fake smiles that I've given to everyone, I wish somebody would look me in the eye and ask me,' What's wrong?'


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